Dallas

A client of mine bought a townhouse in Dallas! I leave tomorrow to decorate in the Lone Star State. I have never visited Texas but 18 years ago when my hair was longer and my boobs were bigger I was mistaken for Charlene Tilton (Lucy on Dallas) by some tragically hip Japanese girls in the Tokyo airport.


I am leaving my husband, 3 kids and 1 dog at home for 3 1/2 days with one of these...


...and these...


...and I'm still worried...and he's scared.

I Love You, Mann

Elliot Mann is a hip bohemian store in the East Village of Manhattan. Their punchy color palette brings a breath of fresh air to smoggy New York.

They have just come out with some fantastic one-of-a-kind handbags made from vintage fabrics. The store is releasing only 20 at a time. I just bought this one here and you should, too.

DREAMIN'

I'm dreamin' of Victoria Hagan's Sullivan Sofa. What a stud.



Image via Elizabeth Dinkel Design.

Opposites Attract

My liberal mother from Eugene...


...just married a conservative oil distributor from Montana.


They decided to build a little rustic home filled with sophisticated touches.



What a great great room. Kravet coffee table and sofa covered in BBerger's cotton velvet in Bayberry. The beams are reclaimed fir. The Chateau Lantern with mica is by Hammerton.


Michael Smith for Jasper's Indian Flower used on the front pillows. One of my all time favorite fabrics. The back pattern is a subtle little stripe called Craquelure by Bergamo. The perfect little stripe.


The center island is honed Absolute Black granite, the perimeter counters are Emperador Dark marble, the floors are circle sawn walnut and the lower cabinets are alder. The upper cabinets are lightly antiqued.


Light fixtures from the Sundance catalog. Grosvenor barstools by GJ Styles.


Killer steel hood. My mom was smart. She asked for it for her birthday before construction began because she knew it was going to be a big ticket item and she knew that big ticket items start to get cut when the budget grows from small cabin to small lodge.


Custom alder dining table by East Creek Design and dining chairs by Pride Sasser. You've gotta love the ever present antler chandelier. A classic.


Cole and Son's India wallpaper. Unexpected but welcome in the house that Doug built.


Bench by Gumps.


Curtains in Travers' Giverney in Rust.


Hickory Chair's Chelsea bed. Circa Lighting chandelier.


Master walk-in closet earned a soft roman and bolsters in Jim Thompson's Regatta and window seat in Stroheim's Vardon in Ottoman.


Bathroom sweetened up with Chelsea Textile's Clematis in Rust.


A Black Tailed buck punched through the Malabar grass clothed wall. Punched tin on the ceiling.


I think new construction in Montana requires you to put in at least one bar per occupant. If you feel like you drink too much head to Montana for awhile. I'm not sure AA exists there. Wool corner pillows in Rogers & Goffigon's Benderlock in Brucefield.


Another Hammerton chandelier.


Sometimes it's the little things...


Walking into my mom's study...


Coffee table by Harden, Kravet's stools covered in Eric Cohler's Dinisen fabric for Lee Jofa, Phillip Jeffries' Arrowroot Grasscloth in Harbor Blue.


Kravet's Medley loveseat with two pillows in Peter Fasano's Kusum in spice and one pillow in Schumacher's woven Hampton Court in brick.


Gorgeous alabaster lamp from Circa Lighting. Sphinx etching by Estelle.


In the guest room duvets and shams by Charles P. Rogers, custom bedskirts from BBerger linen, throws by Simon Pearce. Still looking for the perfect lamp.


You've gotta love Big Sky country. Liquor and horns and heads and grasscloth and alabaster and Michael Smith. Some of my absolute favorite things. Who knew they would meet in Bozeman?

House built by Tim Rote and Kevin Sullivan of Dovetail Construction. Architecture by Bob Gilbert of Stillwater Architecture.

Still No Remote...Comcast Call #3 - Bryan

user Jen_ has entered room
jen>I want a new remote control.
analyst Bryan.33941 has entered room
Bryan.33941>Hello Jen_, Thank you for contacting Comcast Live Chat Support. My name is Bryan.33941. Please give me one moment to review your information.
Jen>Hi. Want to make a pretty girl happy?
Bryan.33941>Hi, Jen!
Jen>I just want a new remote.
Bryan.33941>I understand that you want to request for remote replacement.
Bryan.33941>Is that correct?
Jen>Yep. That is all that I want in the whole wide world. Easy to please. That is me.
Bryan.33941>Just to inform you, you have the option to pick up your order at your nearest local center, have the equipment shipped to you or have a technician to install them for you. Please let me know which is most convenient for you.
Jen>I want you to stick it in a box and bring it to the post office...or have Zappos ship it. Pony Express. I don't care.
Bryan.33941>Would you like me to process the remote replacement with a one time shipping fee of $17.95?
Bryan.33941>Sure, not a problem.
Bryan.33941>For security verification and the protection of your account, may I please have your full Comcast Account Number and the last four digits of your Social Security Number?
Jen>Bryan. Please review my extensive history. I want a remote. Do you know the definition of remote? Ironic.
Jen>My SS# digits are xxxx. My Comcast number...I think you have that. Bryan.
Bryan.33941>Yes, I am now processing the remote replacement order as your request.
Bryan.33941>Thank you for that. Please stay online.
Jen>I like tv. I mean...I LIKED tv.
Jen>Seriously, is there a waiting list for remotes?
Jen>Does one have to qualify?
Bryan.33941>No, to set proper expectation remote replacement request will be deliver to your mailing address with 3-5 business days.
Jen>I think I should cancel Comcast. I just need Atari. I like Atari
Jen>Did you ever play Pong? Or Asteroids? Ms. Pacman?
Jen>Do you remember The Go-Gos? Did you have a mohawk or rubber bracelets? I did. I had hair shelves on my right side. Edgy and timely then. Weird and hard to believe now.
Bryan.33941>Jen, if you want an specific remote type, you will need to contact your local office for them to provide you the remote control that you need to have.
Jen>Seriously? I just want a normal remote. Anything that turns my tv on and off and up and down. Really.
Jen>Bryan. How hard is it?
Bryan.33941>I understand, that is why I am now processing your request, as soon as I completed the order, you will have your remote within 3-5 business days as the normal shipping process.
Bryan.33941>Would you like me to process order?
Jen>I would love it. Asteroid Man.
Bryan.33941>Thank you for that. Please stay online.
Jen>I'm here. Where are you? What country? What state of mind?
Bryan.33941>Our call center is located at Manila, Philippines, Jen.
Jen>I like the Philipines. Lucky. Warm
Bryan.33941>THank you, that is nice to know, I hope you can visit our country someday.
Jen>Bryan...I'd like to come visit. What is your address?
Bryan.33941>I am afraid that we are not allowed to provide my personal information as our operations policy, Jen.
Bryan.33941>By the way can I have the best phone number that you can be reach during the remote control delivery.
Jen>I can understand that. Can you imagine? Your friendly personality could attract droves to your doorstep. That could be awkward.
Jen>Wondering if I could make remote out of one of my sons old remote control cars.
Bryan.33941>I am sorry about that, but we only process order for your Comcast universal remote control.
Jen>Okay. Just send me a remote. Your favorite flavor. Whatever one is the most popular. That is the one that I want. Puhleeze.
Bryan.33941>I will only need your contact number that I will add on your request, just to make sure that you will be receiving the remote on time.
Jen>Really? True story? xxx-xxx-xxxx. Bryan. Promise?
Bryan.33941>Thank you for that. Please stay online.
Jen>Bryan. You aren't sounding any different than Jaymar or Christian. Sound different.
Bryan.33941>I have successfully process your remote replacement on your account, to set proper expectation you will have the replacement with 3-5 business days.
Bryan.33941>Are there any other questions that I might be able to help you with today?
Jen>No. I have been perfectly satisfied. Bryan.
Bryan.33941>I hope I was able to help you with all your concern. By the way, at the end of this chat, please feel free to answer customer satisfaction survey just to let us know the level of service provided you today. I will really appreciate your feedback.
Bryan.33941>Thank you for contacting Comcast! We appreciate your business!
Bryan.33941>Thank you for choosing Comcast, Jen.
Bryan.33941>Have wonderful day ahead!
Bryan.33941>If you need assistance in the future, please do not hesitate to contact us through Live Chat or E-Mail (available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week). Comcast also offers excellent FAQ and Help forums located at www.comcast.com to help you reach a resolution independently. Have a great day!

I Got Goosed

A giant angry goose flew into my giant car tonight.


Probably because it knew I had a sad smoked duck on my passenger seat...


...which morphed into a Banh Mi Taco. Yum.

ETSY

Would somebody buy these 1960s Vintage Rose Famille Lamps?
Come on. They are ridiculously priced at $195.00. Puh-leeze?

Naomi's Lampshades

Today I drove 200 miles to visit the greatest lamp shade shop in Lake Oswego called Naomi's.

My client and I put 5 lamps in a box, 2 in towels, belted 1 in a toddler seat and wrapped one in a forgotten lifejacket. We were good to go.


The gals that run this place do not mess around. They will disassemble, reglue, rewire and reshade your lamp while you wait. They like power tools. I am sure you must write Complete Asskicker on your job application if there is any hope of you being employed here.


These acrylic buddha lamps from C. Damien Fox I found for my client really needed the perfect shades...


...and we found them...


...and then some...


I always say...it isn't time to go home until the car is full.

Acquisitions

People ask me all of the time about buying things online. Is there risk involved? Uh, most definitely. Especially when the large amount of money involved belongs to somebody else. So, I rely on the reputations of established dealers if I can't see and touch the item. Here is one example.

Space and Ouiji needed a new dining table and chairs. I found a set of 6 French bridge chairs from Antiques on Old Plank Road.

He had two more that were similar so we had those upholstered to match.



Then I spoke to the owner. Richard, I said, we like the chairs but we need a table. Can you help me out? Apparently, they have a huge custom shop. Handy. He sent me lots of options.

Pretty...but too sweet.


..which was made for Katie Lee...the ex Mrs. Billy Joel.


Very Giacometti. Nice but not right for us... I believe this was made for one of Barbara Barry's clients.


Now we are getting somewhere. Trestle. We like. A bit too fussy, though.


Ah...love it. We'll take the table but my client doesn't do blondes...


...so we had this trestle table built and had it stained brunette to compliment the chairs. Here it is naked in the shop before the staining process...


The chairs don't all quite match but, oddly, that makes us like them a little bit more...as if they were acquired. Kind of like everything else in the house of Space and Ouiji.

Including Lulu the dog. Who was found at the Piccadilly flea market. Really. THE FLEA MARKET. Isn't that hilarious?